MARYAM WAS RAPED; BUT THE LAWS ARE NOT TO BE BLAMED

Calm down dear, relax, look at my face, take a deep breath, in, out, in, out, will you like a cold drink or some water? "Water will do", she responded. She leaned on the back rest of the seat as I got the water from the fridge. I now see the importance of doing trauma counselling in a very comfortable surrounding, it helps alot. Flashback of emotions and struggle from a narration can be very disturbing for some clients, especially if they are teenagers like this girl sitting behind me right now.
She was raped, but the laws are not to be blamed. As a counselor, getting her out of this trauma and paranoia is my duty, the rest is left for the law makers and the law implementation team.
Here you are honey, I handed over a cup of water to her, she gulped it all down and placed the cup on the centre table. Her legs were stretched on the table so I decided to give her a break. 'Relax, we will continue in five minutes'.
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How are you feeling now? Are we good to go? "Yes" she replied. Let's start it all over again, this time try to narrate without losing control over your emotions, if you realise you are getting too high, take a deep breath and sip some water, I have all the time to wait for you, let us do it your way. "Ok" she nodded.

"He is my headmaster so I not could refuse to go when he called, moreover I did not know he had such intentions when he called me. He saw me sitting in front of the classroom and He said: " Meeriam see me in my office". I started thinking of the reason that has gotten me summoned​ to the headmaster's office at this hour, I do not owe school fees, nor do I remember causing any trouble. I have always tried to be on my best behaviour. 'Maybe he wants to send me on an errand' I console myself with this and rushed into the office.

As shy as I am, I said Good afternoon sir, with my sight straight at my feet. I stood in front of the table with my hands behind me, waiting for a command or better still a speech if that is why I am being called here. There was a moment of silence I could not break because I had nothing to say as it stance now. Mmmh mmmh, he cleared his throat. 'How are you meeriam', I followed with the most obvious of answers, 'I am fine sir'. ' You are a bit far, come this way' he said, pointing to the little space between his table and the cupboard. That space he pass to his seat. That space is like a thin line, you can only pass and not stand, how am I supposed to fit in there, I guess I had forgotten how tiny I was, but I walked straight to the place like a robot. He then got out of his chair and started walking towards me, I stepped back giving him way as I thought he wanted a way out. 'No no, stay there', he said. 'You very beautiful meeriam'. He went straight for my cheeks, Will this man start mentioning my name well. That can wait for now, what is about to happen? I asked myself. Shouting was the last thing that came to mind, I could not think straight anymore, things were getting blurred. The last thing I remember hearing was, 'Do you know you have tiny breast?' and he went straight for my breast. The right word to describe my state is a "blackout". I went totally off, totally motionless madam, I could not do anything madam, I could feel the pain but I could not move madam, I did not resist madam, maybe if I tried resisting I would not be in this state. Madam am I also to be blamed as some people are saying. Maybe I should have shouted, if I could have at least resisted. Madam is it the outcome of a behaviour that makes the action bad? What measure is in place to determine that the punishment a criminal​ receive is fit for his crime. Is it the satisfaction of the victim? the satisfaction of the society? the satisfaction of the judge? or the implementation of the constitutional clauses?
Madam I don't know what to do, can I still go back to who I used to be? I pray this never happen to me again, nor do I wish it happens to any other person. Madam I cannot describe to you how I feel, I am tearing up inside madam, my heart is about to get ruptured!!".

It is ok dear, I have heard you, I understand you. There are somethings you have to understand in life. Pain is universal, but it's universality is only subjected to it's affliction. Which pain a person feels, how intense the pain of a person will be, how one deals with their pain and how fast we get out of our pain differs from one individual to another. I will explain more about why you could not resist to you, and why you are never at fault for what has happened to you. I want you to know that I am here for you, I will be with you along the way, we will get out of this together, at your own pace, and as comfortable as possible. Always know there is someone here for you no matter what the society says.  You have to trust that you are not at fault. You will be criticized, ridiculed and many more of what you do not want. The only person that can strengthen you in all times is Allah the Almighty, and yourself. Exercise patience and endure, the future is always bright for those who patiently persevere​.
Rest now, we continue in 10mins.
Maryam was raped, but the laws are not to be blamed, humanity is to be blamed.

Resting on my seat I wonder how humanity have evolved over these few years. Some are evolving into better human beings, yet others are evolving into something else. Is it that these things used to happen and we did not hear because our world was a big wider then, or these things are happenings of only these days? Are laws of these days too relaxed or morality of this race is too little? The blame game will not solve this issue. Ensuring people are held responsible for what they do, and take responsibility for what they get paid to do is a strategy worth trying. Maybe we can wipe out the half-humans amongst​ us and maintain as little crime rate as possible. Crime? Immorality? I do not know which one fits best here. Let me get back to my little client. She was raped, but the laws are not to be blamed.
Peace!.

Your sister,
Nuhu Alimatu Sadia
Ummi.ug@gmail.com
Ummuabuuha.blogspot.com