BLIND

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They say seeing is believing and believing is the basics of trust.
I have never seen so to me, hearing, and feeling is believing.
But my beliefs hardly lead me to trust.
I don't even trust the one who walks me around.
It is not that i don't want to believe  in them, i just cant help but doubt,  yet i follow every instruction they give me, for i cannot by myself do something's.

whether my clothing's are transparent or opaque,  i cannot help but drag them to all parts of my body.
I need to cover everything, i need to hide from you what i have never seen myself.

My food i only smell and taste, the aroma of food reaches the nose by itself,  but sometimes i cant trust but take a second smell of my food to believe  this is what i am eating.

I heard the imam say in the mosque that,  whatever affliction that befall a person on earth eases his affairs in the hereafter, and that we should in all cases trust and thank the Almighty God. Something in me strongly believe in the God, i do not need to smell him, or feel him, nor hear him. What i know is that , he is alive and he is the only one i believe and trust completely,  he is the only one i wish to see, and if that means i have to be patient until the day of reckoning as the imam always say, then i am ever ready.

I know there are people who love me, and are willing to go places for me. Know that my doubts for what you do for me are not my doing but my nature, i cannot help but feel nervous over what i cannot see, the more reason why i tap my feet twice on the ground before taking a step. The same reason why i take a firm grip of the wall before stepping down. Try to take 10steps with your eyes closed and you will understand what i mean. I will love to trust, yet all i do is doubt. Till when the Almighty destines, it is my prayer He the owner of the universe grant all sick healing, and the spirit of endurance. 

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